Ten Common Mistakes People Make During Divorce (And How To Avoid Them)

Avoiding Common Divorce Mistakes

Divorce is a complex process, often clouded by emotion. It’s easy to make decisions in the heat of the moment that can have long-lasting consequences. While every situation is unique, certain missteps are surprisingly common. Being aware of these pitfalls can empower you to navigate this difficult time more smoothly and secure a more stable future.

Below, our friends from Merel Family Law discuss ten common mistakes people make during divorce and how you can avoid them:

Letting Emotions Drive Financial Decisions

Anger, hurt, or a desire for revenge can lead to demanding unreasonable settlements or fighting over symbolic items at great legal cost. Avoid it by focusing on your long-term financial health. Ask yourself, “Is this fight worth the financial and emotional cost?”

Hiding Assets Or Inflating Debts

Full financial transparency is not just ethical—it’s a legal requirement. Attempting to conceal assets can result in severe penalties, invalidated settlements, and a complete loss of credibility. Avoid it by being brutally honest from the start. Gather all financial documents early.

Neglecting The Tax Implications

A financial award is not always what it seems. Different assets have different tax consequences. Avoid it by consulting a financial advisor or accountant to understand the after-tax value of any proposed settlement.

Using Your Children As Messengers Or Pawns

Placing children in the middle of parental conflict is deeply damaging. They should never be used to relay information or manipulate the other parent. Avoid it by: Using dedicated apps for co-parenting communication or speaking directly to your ex about logistics, keeping the children out of it.

Ignoring The Long-Term Financial Picture

Focusing only on immediate needs, like keeping the house, can be a mistake if you can’t afford the mortgage, taxes, and upkeep on a single income. Avoid it by creating a detailed post-divorce budget. Sometimes, liquidating an asset and splitting the proceeds is the smarter move.

Overlooking Non-Marital Assets

Not all property is subject to division. Gifts or inheritances intended solely for one person are often excluded. Avoid it by clearly documenting the origin of major assets to ensure a fair and accurate division.

Badmouthing Your Ex On Social Media

Venting online is a catastrophic error. Posts can be used as evidence regarding your character, parenting abilities, and financial habits. Avoid it by implementing a strict “no posting” policy about your divorce, your ex, or your new social life. When in doubt, don’t post.

Not Prioritizing Your Children’s Well-Being

It’s easy to get so caught up in the battle that you forget the children are casualties of the war. Avoid it by: Reassuring your children that they are loved by both parents. Seek a child therapist to give them a neutral outlet.

Choosing The Wrong Process For Your Situation

Not every divorce needs to be a brutal courtroom battle. Litigation is often more expensive, slower, and more adversarial than necessary. Avoid it by exploring alternatives like mediation or collaborative divorce, which focus on cooperative problem-solving. A good divorce lawyer can explain the different options and how they pertain to your particular situation.

Failing To Build A Support System

Trying to go it alone is isolating and can amplify stress. Avoid it by: Leaning on trusted friends, family, or a therapist. A support system provides emotional grounding and practical advice.

By recognizing these common traps, you can make informed, rational decisions that protect your financial future and, most importantly, your emotional well-being and that of your children.

Thank you to our friends at Merel Family Law for the below blog.